Respond
Engaging a Colleague in a Supportive Dialogue
There may be reluctance to initiate a conversation about a colleague’s well-being for various reasons. A common misconception is that talking about issues, like suicide or self-harm, could worsen the situation or inadvertently encourage these actions. In reality, the converse is often true. Engaging a colleague or friend in a supportive dialogue regarding such concerns can be a vital step in linking them with essential resources and demonstrating your concern for their welfare.
Be Direct With the Colleague
Identify what the concerning activity is. Doing this privately is typically recommended; however, addressing the entire team is sometimes necessary. Use your judgment. If a colleague's presentation raises concerns about substance abuse, violence, or suicide, ask directly. Do not be afraid to engage, it shows you care.
- “Hi ____. I just wanted to check in. I’ve noticed ____ and wanted to see if you wanted to talk about it.”
- “I’ve noticed ____ and I want you to know that I am here to support you.”
Listen to the Colleague
Actively listen, using a non- confrontational approach and a calm voice. Avoid threatening, humiliating, and intimidating responses. Allow them the opportunity to respond and ask appropriate follow-up questions.
- “I’d like to hear more about that.”
- “I’m sorry, that seems like a difficult situation to be in. What is that like for you?”
- “That sounds really difficult, how is that affecting you?”
Refer the Colleague to University Resources
Remember that your role is to connect the colleague to the right resource for support. Connecting the colleague to additional resources helps prevent a situation in which you become the colleague's main source of support.
- “Thank you for being so open with me. I want to be sure that you can access the resources you need to get through this challenging situation.”
It’s okay to say:
- “I am not sure, but there are people at Columbia who can help.”
- “I am not sure, let me find out.”
Follow Through With the Colleague
Ensure that the colleague gets connected to resources and follow up with the colleague to express ongoing care and concern.
- “How have you been since we last spoke?”
- “Was that resource helpful?”
Conduct Additional Follow-Up if You Remain Concerned
If, after addressing the behavior, you still feel concerned, continue to refer the colleague to the appropriate resources, inform their manager, and notify Faculty Affairs or Human Resources. For more information, visit our Resources section.
Activate a Wellness Check, As Needed
If you have not seen or heard from a colleague over a period of time and/ or you have immediate concern for the colleague's well-being, call Human Resources or Faculty Affairs so that a wellness check through Public Safety can be considered. The purpose of a wellness check is to ensure that a colleague of concern is safe, able to communicate and understands there is concern about their well-being.
- CUIMC Faculty Affairs
Phone: 212-305-5390
Email: ofa-alertline@cumc.columbia.edu - CUIMC Human Resources
Phone: 212-305-4357
Email: cumchr@cumc.columbia.edu